My Worst Running Tragedy so far….

….and My Story Runs On….

Tragedy definition according to Google:

  1. an event causing great suffering, destruction, and distress, such as a serious accident, crime, or natural catastrophe.
  2. a play dealing with tragic events and having an unhappy ending, especially one concerning the downfall of the main character.

Both of these definitions work for me at this point.  Although the 2nd definition is a bit dramatic, it works for the way I feel right now…or at least as of yesterday.

I started this blog yesterday and had to draft it because something just wasn’t clicking for me.  And lo and behold, when I “let go” of my obsession with this tragedy, all of the sudden everything became very clear to me.

Let’s start where I was yesterday:

If you read my last blog post, What?  The ChiRunning Instructor is injured??, you know I am now facing an injury, plantar fasciitis.  Since my last blog post I’ve been doing everything I know to do from rolling my foot on a frozen water bottle 3-4x a day to stretching daily and not running (only ran 3x in the last 13 days).  I have to say it’s feeling much better and I’m looking forward to an appointment with Dr. Calvin this week from One Accord Physical Therapy (where I teach my ChiRunning classes) to get a more detailed assessment.

So where is the tragedy?  I have 2 races that are coming up that I REALLY REALLY want to do for various reasons.

  1. My first one, the CYA (Cool Your Ass) 6/12/24hr on 7/12 in Prescott.  I originally signed up for the 12 hours for this race since it would be pushing me outside my comfort zone.  The longest run for me has been 8 hours and 24 minutes (31 miles).  I’ve also completed 5 marathons so I figured I might just be able to do 50 miles in 12 hours….so this was my next big goal this year. I also wanted to be part of the 2014 Equality Walk but couldn’t commit to the time involved so I figured I could use this as a fundraiser to help them raise money (I walked 100 miles in 2012 for Marriage Equality in AZ).  I’ve been training intensely for the last 3 months for this event which is pretty much how I allowed my injury to happen.
  2. The 2nd one is the Skyline to Sea Marathon on October 11th.  My boyfriend and I are doing a road trip to Napa, CA for my cousin’s wedding and of course I had to google races in the area and found this one.  I wanted to do this one because it sounds sooo pretty.  I love trails more and more I figured it would be great timing after the CYA race.  It’s also a chance for me to do a race solo. I love love being a running coach and running with my friends but sometimes, I like to have a race or an event that is just mine and this one was perfect.

Until yesterday, I’ve been obsessing about these 2 races and trying to figure out how I could still make them happen.  I kept saying I wasn’t going to complete 12 hours because that would be just stupid on a foot with an injury but I’ll do the best that I can and see what happens.  (As much as I believed these words, I know myself enough to say that if I have 12 hours, I probably will take them because I don’t want to stop before I’m supposed to)  And on that day, who knows with the adrenaline, etc, I might not feel any pain in my foot and be OK. Who am I kidding? I also kept thinking about all that mileage that I built up over the last 3 months and how I’m “wasting” it and I’m going to have to start all over again….I’ve literally been a wreck about these events since I realized what my injury was….

So yesterday I stopped writing this original blog and decided to take a break and stretch and ice again.  I felt my frustration as I was trying to relax my calf muscles while I stretched and could body sense that relaxation was not happening. All of the sudden I thought:

What if I do the 6 hour race instead of 12 hours?  What if I decide not to run that race in CA in October?

surrender

My body literally relaxed immediately and I had a complete sense of peace and joy.  Body sensing is a huge component of ChiRunning/Walking and I’m amazed every time I have a moment like this how true it is…your body always knows best and will tell you what to do…you may know it as your “gut instinct”  and it really does work if you know how to pay attention to your body and what it’s telling you. I’m getting better and better at it because of ChiRunning but it still amazes me that it works when needing to make a decision about something. I think about it, detach and let go of the outcome and listen to my body.

Fast forward to after this epiphany:

I realized that it would not be the end of the world to drop down to the 6 hours because it would be safe and there would be no temptation to do anymore than that (and if I’m feeling my heal during this time I will stop). And as much as I REALLY REALLY wanted to do the race in CA, I know I would be rushing through the training and potentially making this injury worst. The race will be there next year….and if not, there will always be another race!

All of the sudden, I’m feeling so much better about my recovery process.  I’m getting excited about other things that I can focus on. I’m looking forward to spending more time doing strength training, especially for my glute medius and core muscles.  I’m looking forward to spending more time stretching (which I rarely do).  Last but not least, as I taught another ChiRunning workshop this morning, I realized, I can get back to the basics and remember what it was like to train for a 5K!  Almost like I’m starting the process all over again but with more knowledge now. (Have you ever said I’d go back to high school but only knowing what I know now?  Same idea 😉 ).

Self awareness can be a curse and a blessing at the same time. This whole time I knew I was creating all this extra negative energy about these races but I allowed myself to be self aware yet let it be OK to be mad about it…..NOW, I’m over it (even though still bummed) and I know that I’m only going to be stronger physically and mentally when I train my body again for my longer distances. expectnothing

Have you ever had a running tragedy?  How did you handle it?

From My Running Story to Yours….
(if you feel inspired to share your comments, do so below…I want to hear your story too!)